Strong enough ...

I have been sitting on the floor of her bedroom for the last two hours.  The packers were efficient, but still in my way, regardless.  I still have piles of receipts to organize, several posts remaining to write.  If I didn’t get some of the work done before we hit the road, I would be late getting them turned in.  The last thing I needed in the middle of all of this would be to let my last couple of assignments slide.

I can’t imagine what I would have done today if the kids had been here.  The chaos of the final days of picking up the house and relocating it across the ocean would have done them in.  I am so thankful for friends right now, even though it’s been strained lately.  As soon as I told them, the distance started.  I heard about dinners that we weren’t invited to, the next morning.  The kids got asked to less playdates than normal.  I guess I understand, but when I confronted Susan about it, she just said there was no point in pretending we would still be here in a couple of weeks.

Shit, I really have no idea what we’re doing.  I try to press the doubts out of my head by pressing my fingertips hard into my temples.  When I said ‘Why Not’ I really meant it, but I sit here wondering what the hell I was thinking.  I’ve always been gutsy, but it usually ended up in a weekend campout, or a new tattoo.  

I guess I wanted most of all to show my support for his career.  At first it was fun researching about our move.  It was nearly hysterical to tell the random stranger that we encountered about India.  The looks on their faces ...

When he left though to start the job, and I was left at home to clean up all of the loose ends and tie up all of the messes ... or is that phrase supposed to be clean up the messes and tie up the loose ends ... I’m so tired I can’t even think straight.  The house ... selling this house, trying to figure out what to do with the car, arguing with the school about releasing the kids’ records early ...

Hearing the door open jarred me out of my internal musings. 

So, ma’am ... we found this pile of cards and things in the bottom of the spice cupboard.  Pack it with the kitchen things?

I stood up and held out my hands for the ribbon wrapped stack. 

Absent-mindedly, I dropped them all next to the yellow immunization cards and closed my eyes, leaning against the bare walls.  Ah, I had forgotten to make copies of the receipts for the travel clinic.  And did I remember to pack the kids’ blankets in the suitcases, or had the movers now stuffed them in with the toilet paper?  The ribbon came untied with my toss, and now all of it was  splayed in a huge mess across the floor.

On the top, familiar handwriting.

To you,

You are so little, yet I can already see that you are spunky, beautifully sassy and oh so strong.  I have a feeling you will be quite the adventurer.  I would dare predict that you will be never content to live a life that is commonplace, or one that keeps your feet rooted anywhere for too long ...

My eyes well up ... I so needed my papa's reassurance, even though he was no longer here.  I needed someone to remind me that I am strong enough for this ...

The prompt this time was ::

"You or your character find a forgotten letter or card from someone important in your life--whether good or bad.  What does it say?  How does it affect you or your character?  What is done with it?"